a watercolor and pen painting and collage. A large green labyrinth is in the center of the picture, with plants and trees and pleasant scenery surrounding it. At the center of a labyrinth are four sleeping figures, one larger and three smaller. There is a partial red Zia Pueblo sun behind them. The labyrinth has four arrows pointing out from it, resembling a compass, with cardinal directions in unexpected places. (South points up, North points right, West points down, East points left).

The participants are all beloved stars.

Multiple (at least three) participants told stories about their parents and caregivers during their interviews. Four also talked about parenting while on the tenure-track. While everyone mentioned the roles of mentors and elders, the stories about parents and parenting were reflections of self, of resilience against institutional and systemic oppression. In particular, participants reflected on their childhood selves–fiery, whimsical, go-getter, resourceful–in ways that projected their love for themselves, their hopes for their future, and gratitude for their roots. One person commented, simply, “My father had dreams for me.”

Participants who had experienced extreme low points professionally due to institutional betrayal sought to “find my way back” to a sense of being valued, loved, and unstoppable as a force for good.

Studies

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